Tuesday, 13 May 2014

Midnight Daydreams

Statutory Warning: This writing lacks coherence and is full of SPAG errors. Proceed at your own risk.

It's early dawn. Might be called as very late night, the wee hours. None is awake. I woke up. Partly because I missed you, partly because it is raining and I felt cold. Lying awake, I thought of you. And the rain. It had a different fragrance when I had you, didn’t it?

Going to that park, finding a dry spot on a bench and somehow sit there, close to each other. The air is chilly and to counter it, we needed that heat from each other, didn’t we? So close that your head is near my face, and do you remember my irritation when your hair, flying with the breeze tickled my face, the noises I made and how I used to rub my face, and smelling you. Desires awaken. You used to stare into my eyes, asking, what is it that you need? My eyes, half embarrassed half hesitant, could never say, its you that I want, don’t you feel it? You would suddenly place our head on my chest and my arm goes around you, to tell the world I own you.

The afternoon turned into evening and the light-stands lit up. Lovers, like us they probably longed for each other as well, started to leave. We have to leave, we both realised it with a pang. But can we? Can we stand a second of separation? We look each other, eyes urging, find an excuse not to go. Begging each other, just don’t go. Like in a trance, we stood up. Walking was so difficult when we hug each other so tightly, isn’t it? Trembling from the chill, tumbling due to our awkward embrace, we took steps towards a separation. God knows when shall we meet again, if ever. Each step cost us a day of our life.

Now we are near your place. The alley is dark, thank God someone broke the lights in the stand. We walked together, closely holding each other. Heartbeat raising, for soon is the time when this society and its rules will take you away from me. What will I do if it rains tonight again? We are there, in front of the gate. Standing face to face, eyes glistening, no not from love, but the tears we both are trying our best to control, putting up a brave face. You touched my face, from my forehead to the chin, you had this unique style, remember how it made me feel awkward when you did in the full view f the public? I smiled, lips closed and pressed together and patted your cheek. Took a sharp about turn and walk away as fast as I could, never looking back for I can't go if I look back. I always felt your eyes on my back, I never checked but I always knew it.

The first birds are singing, hey another day is breaking. The rain has stopped, like we did. Its another long sunny day, another day without you. I have to start now but before I sit up, I murmured for one last time, hey I miss you.

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